Gotta Grab the World by the Ballz

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Random Thoughts 7/15/08

Posted by fredfierce on July 16, 2008

I’m sitting here bored….possibly going out tonight to a club. I’ve been meaning all day to write some random thoughts floating around in my head this week….

Bootcamp is this Friday. Fuck…I’m pretty nervous now that it’s a few days away. The small little chode in me wants to not go. The chode would rather spend Friday night seeing The Dark Knight. The chode says “Hey man, why take a bootcamp now…you got two makeouts this week…you’re making enough progress on your own”. I know this is complete bullshit though. As a strong man, I’m taking care of what is impoirtant to me. Let’s face it….my goal is to be able to bang the hot chicks that I never could. To be the best man I can be, and to lead by example. This weekend is a huge step for me, and as a man….I know this is my mission. Much like I do anything, i will be 100% LISTENING and LEARNING. Whether it’s my trainer at the gym, or with my boss at work….I’m always looking to improve and to never let me ego enflate. The same will apply this weekend. I’m facing the unknown….but I’m ready.

I’ve been reading The Way of a Superior Man. I’m a little bit halfway through the book and WOW, what an awesome read so far. So many ideas that the author writes are so much directly related to pick up…and RSD’s philosophies and ideas. He explains the crucial importance of masculine and feminine polarities. Having a strong polarity is what makes relationships and intimacy work. The man is the giant oak tree and the woman is the chaotic squirrel climbing around the tree. He also teaches the importance of trusting in yourself. The woman cant take charge…she cant lead…and she cant make crucial decisions by herself. She goes through an array of random emotions a day, and she needs a man she can trust to be “her rock”.

I look back at my past relationships that failed, and I finally realized why they did. I was indecisive…I was reactive and emotional…I didnt trust myself….I was too logical when my girl just needed me to love her and hold her instead of “trying to figure her out”. It’s funny really…because my first love broke up with me a few years ago. She never gave me a reason why, and I dont think she stills knows. It drove me crazy, because I wanted to know so badly why, and what I had done wrong. But the truth is, shes a highly emotional and chaotic woman. She needed a solid and unshakeable man that she could trust to guide her through her emotional rollercoaster. That wasn’t me back then. :Sigh: It feels so good to get all that out. When I’m done with this book, I’m going to write a review of it on my blog.

Last random thought is this….WOWWWWWWWWW I fuckin love women LMAO. Like youre thinking to yourself….well no shit Fred…you wouldnt be into pick up and RSD if you didnt. But recently…I dont know…I crave feminine energy so much. Their smooth and soft skin, their submissiveness, their sensuality, their beauty is really driving me insane. I was at the gym last night during the ellipitcal machine. I’m tired as fuck and sweaty all over. All of a sudden, a young woman walks by me. She was long brown hair in french braids, slim build with muscle, tan with a nice ass. I imagined her in bed with me, layign there as I held her…with my arm around her as she become submissive to my masculinity…

While I think this, a shot of energy came through me. It wasn’t horniess. It was just her feminine energy flowing through my body. I never felt somethoing like that before. Maybe because I didnt allow myself. But lately, I’m just enjoying women completely for who they are, and I’m not afarid to accept that. It feels AMAZING…its rejuvenating.

Anyway, Enough thinking…time for action….Next entry should be friday. Peace

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